THE DUNNY OUT THE BACK

When I was a lad, we had a dunny out the back
Just a hundred feet away from the house
Down a little narrow track
I never paid a call, as often as I should
Because upon  opening the door
The smell, boy, was it good
Once inside, it was cold, dark, and clammy
Sitting there with my parts all bared
Sent shivers up my tummy
At night, with the blankets over my head
I would give thanks
For the chamber pot, stowed under my bed
Once, while in the toilet, in the rain
A large spider, bit me on the leg
Jeepers, what a pain
I was up, and out of there, as fast as I could run
Screaming, dad, dad, dad
A bloody great spider, just bit me on the bum
"Quiet, quiet, son" he said
"You are making enough noise to wake the dead"
Now, when I am in the toilet, with its air conditioned heat
Sitting ensconced upon my china throne
My mind drifts back to that old bush dunny, with its solid wooden seat.

~Tango~