Near The Edge

 

In the darkness of my basement I lie on the floor,
just a little bit of light peaks from underneath the door.
It is cold, I am shivering in my own sweat,
the open window lets in the air with every stroke of wind hitting on my skin.
It is like being slapped.
I can't move, I can't make a sound,
all I can hear is the drummings of my heart pound.
Every hair follicle is like a ton of weight pulling at my skin,
the rush of blood like poison in my veins,
a thousand needles pricking me from within.
It is excruciating,
paralysing by the hour.
Time does not seem to be moving any faster,
I can feel my brain touching the insides of my skull,
threatening to shatter the bones,
reduced to mere fragments of stones.
The tears trickle down my cheek and they sting,
I try to move but all I can think of is the intensity of this pain.
I want out, I want peace,
I never wanted to end up like this.
But the doors are closed on me now,
I can't think of another way or how,
with that released;
The poison liquid from my wrists,
spilling into a pool all around.
As I lie in the darkness...slowly surround,
the little light slowly fading.
My body starts to shut down,
the beatings of my heart slowly trailing,
and I keep falling endless, until the silence is deafening...
I keep falling... falling...

and then there was this speck of dust,
a little white grain,
hovering above me.
Closer and closer it got to me,
as I felt the life being sucked out of me.
But just before I let go of my last breath with that speck,
it spoke to me.
Don't let go,
don't let go,
there is still something you have to know.
I pray, I hope I am not too slow,
there is something you must know,
with every word it seemed to say.
That speck of dust went further away,
to where I could no more reach it at,
swallowed in the clouds of black.
Try as I might to reach out, it was all in vain,
I have drowned too deep in my own pain.
The darkness now holds me in embrace,
I will never know what that message was...

~*Rajwinraj*~